Sir Isaac Newton's First Law of Motion, the one that defines inertia, states in part that an object in motion will remain in motion unless it is acted on by an external force.

 

A new corollary to that law -- let's call it, oh, the Principle of Canadian Trash Flowing into Michigan -- states that a large stream of heavy matter moving in the same direction at the same speed for a long period of time will ultimately acquire the inexorable power of a force of nature, and it will keep flowing regardless of the obstacles rolled into its path by puny governmental bodies. It also helps if that stream is supported by the U.S. Constitution and NAFTA.

 

According to this article by the Detroit Free Press, that sums up the current status of the saga of a Michigan citizens group's quest to curtail the amount of trash flowing from Ontario into their state's landfills.

 

Once they complete that quest, maybe we (or whichever generation of our descendants are living at that time) could ask those 'Ganders to see what they can do about global warming, or the rise and fall of the tides.

 

Adventures in Carjacking
Have you caught wind of the story about the klutzy crook in Phoenix who snatched a purse, tried several times to hijack a car, sorta succeeded on the third try after causing a couple crashes, drove the would-be getaway car into a utility pole, and was caught hiding in a garbage bin a couple blocks away?

 

I won't make too much light of the incident because at least one person was hurt and a lot of property was damaged. But at least this extravaganza of criminal ineptitude ended with a stroke of poetic justice. The hideout the perp holed up in sounds exactly like the type of place he belongs.

 

Pete Fehrenbach is assistant managing editor of Waste News. Past installments of this column are collected in the Inbox archive.

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